It is almost impossible to imagine that last week was senior ball and my 18th birthday. Idunno if it was just me, but this week has been by far one of the slowest, but probably one of the most pivotal weeks in my life. I may have grown more in the past few days then I have in the past 18 years of my life. When I looked at a calendar this past week, my mind was blown that only a week ago was senior ball. My mind is so jumbled with everything that went on this week. Last week I feel like I thought everyone in my life was invincible. I mean comon, if we can have a party in a hotel after sr ball and everyone wind up being perfectly fine, even when people drive. With all of those great memories that were created taht night. Then the day of my birthday, spending it with my family and friends. Then on monday, made plans with Johnny for Sr box and began recruiting people. then Tuesday, everything slowed the fuck down. I heard about sam during first period, but I dont think it really hit me. I was sort of like, jesus, can it be true. Then when I came upstairs, it just came down like a landslide. Honestly, I can’t remember a thing I did between Tuesday and today, other than that shit AP exam. After all the emotion and sadness, this week is coming to a close. It is scary to think that I’ll never see sam at the most random times (at st marys, at soccer games, just being out).

However, the thing taht truely made an effect was at his prayer service at Moreau. Hearing everyone talk about how much Sam touched them as well made me wonder what people would feel if I died. Would I have effected this many lives and left this mark that he left. What impression have i left? It really is shocking to see. I hope he has been able to see how much people truely loved him and everything he stood for. Especially his goal to do one nice thing for somebody a day (which jenae posted from larry). I wish I had this pure kindness in me.

anyway, back to studying for this final I have to take on Sunday -_____-.

I have to work Mr Parker’s wedding tomorrow as well.

pray for sam’s family please, I saw Chanel at People Print at southland, I almost broke down because I had honestly no idea what to say. I just gave her a hug and let her finish talking to Nicolette.

duces